By Pamela Auma
In 2006, while living in the United Kingdom, Mr. Odongo Regan Alfred filed for divorce against me. At the time, our marriage had been rocked by persistent domestic violence.
I was young, vulnerable and full of hope that our union could still be saved. When Mr. Odongo returned with pleas for reconciliation, I chose to forgive him. We reconciled outside any formal court arrangement, and resumed our life together. This reconciliation bore fruit (our children), the eldest now 18 years old.
On 28th May 2011, we returned to Uganda and solemnized our union through a customary marriage, fulfilling every traditional requirement as prescribed by our culture.
We were husband and wife, not just in the eyes of our community, but in the eyes of God and our children.
Over the years, Mr. Odongo and I toiled together to acquire property in Uganda: land, a marital home and other investments.
These were jointly acquired, and some bear both our names on official titles. Yet today, I find myself being falsely accused and publicly humiliated.
Recently, Mr. Odongo has gone back to a UK court to seek another divorce, this, after our 2006 reconciliation and our remarriage under customary law.
What baffles and hurts me deeply is that this same man is now using the media to paint me as a woman who came to Lira to grab his property. I reject this false and malicious narrative in the strongest terms possible.
Let it be known that I did not grab any property. I lived, built and sacrificed for those properties alongside him. Mr. Odongo has no legal or moral authority to push me out of a home we built together, without following due process.
When I embraced reconciliation years ago, it was not out of foolishness. It was because I was raised as a Lango woman who upholds the values of marriage, dignity and family.
I believed and still do, that marriage is sacred and not something to walk away from at the first sign of trouble. That belief, however, should not be weaponized against me.
As fate would have it, Mr. Odongo’s struggle with alcohol has worsened over the years. His excessive drinking has contributed to the decline of his mental health, manifesting in paranoia and delusional accusations. This is not just sad; it’s dangerous both to himself and to the integrity of the family we once shared.
Most recently, when I returned to Uganda to attend my sister’s wedding, I was denied entry to my own marital home. Mr. Odongo’s cousin, Ogwang Olwa Veve, refused to give me the house keys and pushed me out of my own house.
Mr. Odongo himself traveled from abroad with the sole aim of blocking my access to the house that has been our marital home since 2013.
I want to make it clear to some media and to the general public that I will not allow falsehoods to go unchallenged. I will not be painted as a scheming opportunist when all I’ve ever done is invest in love, family and stability.
Mr. Odongo must stop dragging my name through the mud. He must come to terms with the reality he’s trying so hard to deny that we built this life together.
And if he wishes to separate, let it be done with honesty, dignity and the truth.
A woman’s voice, A mother’s strength.
This is my story. This is my truth. And I will not be silenced.
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